Finding Hope: My Story

It's November.  Meaning it is Thanksgiving.  Meaning that it is the month of gratitude. I have been thinking about this a lot lately.  I have been pondering, as my BYU career comes to a close, what I am the most grateful for right now.  And I have to be honest, there are a lot of things for me to be grateful for. First, I am grateful for my family.  That they are able to handle my stressed out rantings and ravings and that they still love me at the end of the day.  I am grateful that they are there to catch me when I fall and lift me up when I need it. I am grateful for my friends.  Like seriously, how on earth did I go from the shy kid who was afraid that no one would even WANT to like her to who I am today.  I can honestly say that it is because of the many wonderful friends who have blessed my life, whether they were only in it for a moment or have stuck it out with me for years.  You know who you are you wonderful folks. I am grat...

Okay, I know that I shouldn't take this out on boys everywhere, but I want to. Do you ever feel like you are just...average?  I feel that way all the time.  I am average height.  I have average brown hair and average blue/green eyes that can never decide which color they want to be...so they just aren't a color.  I am completely average looking and easy to miss in a crowd. And so it happens.  I get passed over all the time and gosh darn it it hurts after a while. I was talking to my good friend Sammy last night about this.  About how it is easy for a strong, confident woman to get passed over by a man.  He says that it is a delicate balance for a girl to walk between being helpless and needing no one. I see his point.  I don't want to be a damsel in distress because, well, that isn't me.  However, if I am not willing to let people in to my life, then no, they aren't going to seek me out or date me because I seem like I don't need them...